My one-liners.....

What’s the one line I’d love to tell all these people? Here it goes...

To dad: “If you hadn’t married mom, where would I be?”

To mom: “If you knew dad was stingy before, would you still marry him?”

To brother: “I’ve managed with my cell-phone for 10 months with a starting balance of just 777 rupees. Don’t you think I’m the best brother in the world?”

To sister-in-law: “Would you please tie this rakhi on your husband’s arm?”

To nephew: “Do you think the Indian Government has to cut down taxes for imported baby diapers?”

To my friends: “If you are my friends, who need enemies?”

To Shahrukh: “You are the king” (respecting the sentiments of all SRK fans)

To Deepika Padukone: “Have we met before?” “I lost my phone number, can I have yours?” “Will you marry me?”

To every BT student: “There is plenty of scope in Biotechnology, but absolutely no job offers”

To committed girls: “You have no idea what you have missed. You just need to look better”

To eligible bachelors: “Back off. I was here first”

Aishwarya Rai: “My PU results toppled because of you”

Sanjay Dutt: “What the heck you doing here. Aren’t you supposed to be in jail?”

Salman Khan: “Ha! Katrina Kaif’s all mine now”

Indian cricket team: Nothing. I don’t talk to losers

You: “Thanks for reading this. Next time, pay me in cash”

Myself: “Shut this off. Its 1am. Its time to watch T.V”